First Love
By Sarah Brady

But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.
Revelation 2:4 (ESV)
 

Do you remember when you were first in love? Your palms were sweaty and your heart raced. You longed to be near that special person, to spend hours talking about anything and everything. And you were probably willing to do things that you wouldn’t normally do—whether that meant hiking instead of shopping, or going to a movie that wasn’t your first pick, or even eating a different type of food than you preferred.

We all know that love—real love—can cause us to take some drastic measures. Take, for example, my situation. Last Saturday morning, I got up around 6:40 a.m. Now, that time may not seem very early to you, but I struggle to be a morning person—especially when it comes to Saturdays.  So why would you have found me wiping sleep from my eyes as I walked downstairs before 7:00 a.m. that day?  Because I love my husband, who was studying for one of the largest tests of his life.

Do you realize the funniest thing about this situation? I’m long past the early days of being in love. My husband and I met nearly six years ago, and we’ve been married for almost four. But I still remember those first months of dating, engagement, and marriage and how we’d nurture each other so selflessly, especially by spending time with and doing for each other. Even during the dry times that come to our marriage, I refuse to forget the intensity and ardor of those early days, knowing that, if I do, our relationship could grow stale. And so, as small as it may seem, I choose to go out of my way to make our relationship a priority in my life, to help my husband know that I have not left our first love behind.

Similarly, those of us who are Christians remember the early days of our love for the Lord. We were on fire! There was nothing we weren’t willing to do for God. If He called us to a third-world country, we were willing to go. We’d tell everyone about Him. If we were convicted of sin, we confessed quickly, not wanting to miss a moment of fellowship with the Lord.

But time passed. We began to realize how tired we were on Sunday mornings and figured that missing one service wouldn’t hurt us. And, sure, we were moved during that sermon and knew that the Lord wanted us to go forward to pray, but couldn’t we talk to Him just as well in our seats?  And those quiet times of prayer and reading Scripture grew dry. We said that we loved the Lord, but we weren’t as willing to do whatever He asked, nor did we spend as much time with Him.  What happened?

We had forgotten, or abandoned, our first love, the passion we had during the early days of our relationship with Him, the ardor that made us wholly committed to Him.

In the book of Revelation, John recorded letters to seven different churches. In each letter, Christ commends or condemns (or both) the church to whom He is speaking. The first of the letters is to the church of Ephesus.  He begins by telling the Ephesians that they have done well in not accepting evil in their midst and by bearing their trials patiently. Then the tone of the letter changes. Christ says in Revelation 2:4, “But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first.” In other words, they were doing many of the right things but had missed the heart of the matter: love. 

God longs for a close relationship with us, a relationship that is filled with love more than duty. And there is a difference. For example, I could have made breakfast for my husband out of a feeling of obligation instead of love. Would he have known? Probably, because my heart would have affected my focus and, thus, my attitude.  If my husband can discern my motivations, I can be sure that the God of the universe knows my heart. He knows when I’m serving Him out of duty rather than love, when I’m doing the right thing because I want to look good instead of because of the passion I have for Him.  And He has something against us when we abandon our first love for Him.

So let’s return to our early days of love for our Lord. After all, we have every motivation to do so, because His care for us is so great.  Who else has been willing to give all to receive so little in return? We owe Him so much; the least we can do is love Him the way we did in the early days of our relationship.

Sarah Brady is an assistant professor and a writer. She is married to a wonderful man who is currently in medical school. They enjoy serving together at church, where he teaches a Bible study class and she sings in the choir and in an ensemble. In her free time (what little there is), she likes to read, write, act, and go hiking.  If you would like to comment on this article, feel free to email writers@blessedlady.com.


 

Relationships